Get to know me...
Hello you beautiful human, my name is Wanita and I am a fully qualified, certified and insured coach. It's my mission to help you to understand how to best help yourself. How would it feel to totally accept yourself? To like, love and nurture yourself in the same way that you do your nearest and dearest.
Remember, there's only one of you in this life and you've already won by being here! You are a gift in this world so grace it with your best presence.
I want you to feel more happiness and ease with your life than you've ever felt before. Together we'll co-create a plan of action and I'll be your greatest cheerleader and help motivate you to achieve your goals and the life you never thought was possible.
How I got into Coaching
I come from a 20+ year back ground working in the IT industry, which is a career that I enjoy, but I wanted more, there was just something missing. I trained as a Mental Health First Aider and a Domestic Abuse Champion and supported my colleagues in my workplace at any opportunity I got.
Then came the pandemic and I began to suffer with my own mental health again, so I started training as a life coach to initially help myself. I'd tried everything else, from anti-depressants, HRT, counselling and therapy but I have to say that the positive, forward looking nature of coaching made a massive different not only to my mental health but also for my menopause symptoms. From there I began coaching colleagues in my workplace and then took the leap to me setting up my own coaching practice. I have been through the very same process I'm offering you and as you can tell I'm a big advocate.
My life before Coaching
At 49 years old I've suffered many of life's challenges. I grew up within an abusive and cold family and developed into a shy, unconfident and unhappy adult with poor coping skills.
Aged 42, I hit what I thought was the lowest point in my life where I began my peri-menopause & started having panic attacks and barely sleeping. Although, at the time I didn't know I had started the peri-menopause because it's not widely discussed. We are taught about puberty and periods at school but we aren't prepared for the peri-menopause. I hadn't even heard of it!
So, I entered therapy to try to help myself and through that realised that I had grown apart from my husband and after 26 years together we divorced.
As soon as I walked out of the family home I felt that I'd lost my whole identity. I no longer had a purpose as a wife and as a mother, I didn't know who I was any more. I had never lived alone and I didn't even know what I liked or I didn't I like on my own. All I knew for sure was that I wanted to find out about me. I wanted to be happy, to be able to stand on my own two feet and look after myself, but that isn't what happened.
I was consumed with guilt for the perceived hurt that I'd caused my family, which set me on a path of self-destruction. Because I was vulnerable I attracted the wrong partner and found myself involved with a toxic, abusive and partner, who actively encouraged drinking copious amounts of alcohol on a daily basis to cope (no doubt to make his gaslighting of me easier).
I thought that my family break-up was my lowest point in my life, but that was nothing to how I ended up feeling after 4 years in that toxic relationship. I lost all confidence, self-respect and self-trust. In short, I despised myself for the life I was living, but you can't bully yourself into better mental health and wellbeing. I know that now.
I can look back now and realise that my lack of understanding of peri-menopause and issues typical at midlife (such as empty nest and divorce) coupled with my poor coping skills left me vulnerable. The GP had said I was too young for menopause and that was that. I never got the information and support that I so clearly needed. I want to be that support for you.
I don't want you to feel as lost and alone as I did. I can help you find your way through midlife and menopause... an informed, supported and equipped one.
My life after Coaching
'I was left with one person, one person who had been there for me all along......me.....I've come to realise that I am not defined by what's happened to me or my thoughts and feelings. They come and go...no...what I want to be remembered for, and what brings me joy is what I do and how that makes people feel and that's what defines me'
My life now is very different, I am different. I have a career and colleagues who are supportive. I've even found my soul mate, who shares my passion and vision for life. I look after myself well, I no longer drink alcohol at all and I'm a regular gym goer. I respect myself. I like myself. I think I'm ok.
Oh don't get me wrong, I'm no saint, I still have my struggles (aka chocolate! and my love of napping) but I manage them much better. I bounce back faster on my bad days. I have developed the tools, strategies and techniques to get through difficult times and remain positive. I want to share them with you.